Losing a pet is hard.

Know that you are not alone on this journey.
Research has shown that the loss of a companion animal can be just as painful, if not more than, grieving for the loss of a family member or friend. Grieving is very individual and experienced differently by everyone. There are different influences on how we experience grieving and what our perception of that process should look like is.

My biggest advice is to be kind to yourself. Allow yourself time each day to isolate yourself from your busy daily life and allow yourself to feel your emotions. Your pet may be gone in a physical sense but your memories and feelings of caring towards them will always live on. Give yourself grace to know that the emotions are real and it is okay. Your love and care for that animal was real, the bond was real and the grief is real. It is real and it is okay. You have a community of animal-lovers that are behind you.

Writing a letter to your pet telling them of your appreciation for your bond, sharing your favorite memories or about the day you first got them or met them, or how they helped you in life. If you have feelings of guilt, or that you need to apologize for anything that did or did not happen, you can add and explain to them why that happened. Writing this letter may be difficult and does not need to be included all in one letter, but over many letters. Your pet was special to you and this letter will be special to them.

Find a way to memorialize the love for your pet. Memorializing the memory of your beloved pet can be a good way of feeling closure. Your relationship with your pet was one of a kind therefore the memorial can be just as unique as your pet. Some may choose to use an urn with your pets ashes, a shadow box of photos, collar or paw prints, planting a tree or shrub, creating memorial stones, cremation jewelry to allow one to keep their loved one close by or having a funeral service for your pet.

Be sure to continue to take care of yourself and/or providing care and routine for your living pets and family. Pets will sometimes grieve as we as people do. These emotions can be demonstrated by hiding behaviors, searching for the lost family member or wanting to spend more time bring with people. Try keeping as much of a routine as possible, continue the normal feeding time, walking schedule as this can help them process the loss.

Dr. Holly Rudolf